Dwarven MineDwarven Mine | Art by Alexander Forssberg

Hi, I'm Michael Celani, and I'm on a mission to prove that red lands suck. If you haven't seen the first part of this duology, here ya go. Otherwise, we're diving right back in where we left off!

Throne of Eldraine — Castles

1. Castle LocthwainCastle Locthwain
2. Castle ArdenvaleCastle Ardenvale
3. Castle GarenbrigCastle Garenbrig
4. Castle VantressCastle Vantress
5. Castle EmberethCastle Embereth

Are you seriously telling me that more people want to hold up what's effectively five mana to scry two instead of having an on-board power boost? Castle EmberethCastle Embereth does (what's frankly) the important part of Kavaron, Memorial WorldKavaron, Memorial World with no setup and no land sacrifice.

I've heard Castle VantressCastle Vantress explained as "the perfect land for someone who wants to hold up mana for a CounterspellCounterspell," but who's holding up five mana for a CounterspellCounterspell? Are they hard-casting ForceForce?

The rest of the castles fare better. Castle GarenbrigCastle Garenbrig is actually just Ancient TombAncient Tomb for creatures, with the caveat that it can't get off the ground as early. Castle ArdenvaleCastle Ardenvale is still no prize, but I can imagine actually activating it in a pinch.

It's Castle LocthwainCastle Locthwain that's the true winner here, since incidental card draw is the cream of the mushrooms when it comes to utility lands.

Throne of Eldraine — Basic Counters

1. Mystic SanctuaryMystic Sanctuary
2. Witch's CottageWitch's Cottage
3. Gingerbread CabinGingerbread Cabin
4. Dwarven MineDwarven Mine
5. Idyllic GrangeIdyllic Grange

These mono-color lands enter untapped with upside if you control three or more other lands with the same basic land type.

Among these, Mystic SanctuaryMystic Sanctuary has become blue's Mortuary MireMortuary Mire, and it's been recurring Time StretchTime Stretch basically since the day it was printed. It's unique in its ability to retrieve nonpermanent spells, meaning it's far and away the most popular of the cycle.

Black claps back with Witch's CottageWitch's Cottage, an actual Mortuary MireMortuary Mire, but if green's PendelhavenPendelhaven plagiarism has shown us anything, it's that rehashing the same thing over and over has diminishing returns.

The green, red, and white lands have rewards that are basically never worth the risk of playing a tapped single-color land.

Zendikar Rising — Mythic MDFCs

1. Sea Gate RestorationSea Gate Restoration
2. Agadeem's AwakeningAgadeem's Awakening
3. Shatterskull SmashingShatterskull Smashing
4. Turntimber SymbiosisTurntimber Symbiosis
5. Emeria's CallEmeria's Call

There's one thing I've learned going through all these land cycles, and it's that you can only really count on one or two cards in a set being any good. Each cycle has a clear cutoff point from "playable" to "who cares," and in this set, it's pinned squarely at Shatterskull SmashingShatterskull Smashing.

For the playables, Sea Gate RestorationSea Gate Restoration is a beautiful card. It's a land drop in the early game, and a way to refresh your hand in the late game. Agadeem's AwakeningAgadeem's Awakening is also a land early and a way to refresh your board late.

For the unplayables, we have Shatterskull SmashingShatterskull Smashing, an over-costed removal spell. Red has never been very good at destroying creatures, but having to drop eight mana into a spell to take down any given green creature has me doubting that I'll ever cast the front side.

Turntimber SymbiosisTurntimber Symbiosis is too inconsistent to be worth its cost, and I'm still baffled by the fact that Emeria's CallEmeria's Call doesn't give the Angels it summons indestructible. In fact, I'd hazard a guess and say if it only gave Angels indestructible, its inclusion rate would go up, because then people would look at it like an Angel-typal payoff instead of some weird pre-combat combat trick.

Zendikar Rising — Rare MDFCs

1. Valakut AwakeningValakut Awakening
2. Glasspool MimicGlasspool Mimic
3. Hagra MaulingHagra Mauling
4. Ondu InversionOndu Inversion
5. Kazandu MammothKazandu Mammoth

Red with another rare win here. Valakut AwakeningValakut Awakening is genuinely useful: It's a land card that saves you from mana flood, which means you're happy to see it whether you need a land or you don't.

Glasspool MimicGlasspool Mimic is great too, because getting another copy of a value creature is fantastic. Hagra MaulingHagra Mauling is never getting cast for three, but it's removal, and that's always helpful.

I've never seen anyone cast Ondu InversionOndu Inversion. If you're gonna pay eight mana to wipe the board, you might as well RiftRift or Final ShowdownFinal Showdown. Despite that, I've actually attempted to include Ondu InversionOndu Inversion in a deck; Kazandu MammothKazandu Mammoth, a landfall creature that doesn't make tokens or have evasion, has never tempted me.

Zendikar Rising — Creature MDFCs

1. Tangled FlorahedronTangled Florahedron
2. Blackbloom RogueBlackbloom Rogue
3. Skyclave ClericSkyclave Cleric
4. Akoum WarriorAkoum Warrior
5. Umara WizardUmara Wizard

Does anyone even remotely care about these cards?

Okay, there's exactly one deck I can imagine playing these in: Tazri, Beacon of UnityTazri, Beacon of Unity, because four out of the five cards in this cycle are party creature types.

If you're curious what impact party has had on Commander, I would like to inform you that Tangled FlorahedronTangled Florahedron, the card that doesn't interact with the mechanic, has more includes than the rest of the cycle combined.

Zendikar Rising —The Rest

Okay, so there's like, three more spell-lands for each color in Zendikar Rising and I have no idea how these are supposed to fit into cycles. So, I just decided to put one of each color's cards into heats based on their overall performance.

The Good

1. Malakir RebirthMalakir Rebirth
2. Bala Ged RecoveryBala Ged Recovery
3. Sejiri ShelterSejiri Shelter
4. Kazuul's FuryKazuul's Fury
5. Silundi VisionSilundi Vision

We're starting off with the very best from each color, and this is a neck-and-neck race between Malakir RebirthMalakir Rebirth and Bala Ged RecoveryBala Ged Recovery. Like Sea Gate RestorationSea Gate Restoration and Agadeem's AwakeningAgadeem's Awakening taught us, it seems the key to becoming a popular modal double-faced land is to be a useful land drop early and a value-based threat late.

Getting value, whether it be recursion or card advantage, is the only way to make these spells scale with the power of your deck. Zof ConsumptionZof Consumption will always be hot garbage, but Bala Ged RecoveryBala Ged Recovery draws you the best card you've already played, which is something you control during deckbuilding.

You can see this dichotomy when you look at the numbers. Both Malakir RebirthMalakir Rebirth and Bala Ged RecoveryBala Ged Recovery have nearly a quarter of a million includes, while Sejiri ShelterSejiri Shelter and below don't even crack one hundred thousand.

Sure, bad protection, bad fling, and bad ImpulseImpulse are still playable, but they pale in comparison to real cards in a way that Malakir RebirthMalakir Rebirth and Bala Ged RecoveryBala Ged Recovery don't.

The Bad

1. Khalni AmbushKhalni Ambush
2. Kabira TakedownKabira Takedown
3. Spikefield HazardSpikefield Hazard
4. Jwari DisruptionJwari Disruption
5. Zof ConsumptionZof Consumption

Khalni AmbushKhalni Ambush is the last of the original MDFCs that I would consider playing. The rest are never getting cast for their front sides except in extremely specific scenarios, and if I'm playing these out as a land nine times out of ten, I want that land untapped.

The Ugly

1. Vastwood FortificationVastwood Fortification
2. Song-Mad TreacherySong-Mad Treachery
3. Makindi StampedeMakindi Stampede
4. Beyeen VeilBeyeen Veil
5. Pelakka PredationPelakka Predation

Shout-out to black this competition. Not only does it have the best card of all fifteen in Malakir RebirthMalakir Rebirth, it also has the two worst in both Zof ConsumptionZof Consumption and Pelakka PredationPelakka Predation. I'm predicting that black is the most polarized of the colors, because for every incredible, game-changing card it shows me, there's another terrible dud.

Adventures in the Forgotten Realms — Manlands

1. Lair of the HydraLair of the Hydra
2. Den of the BugbearDen of the Bugbear
3. Hall of Storm GiantsHall of Storm Giants
4. Cave of the Frost DragonCave of the Frost Dragon
5. Hive of the Eye TyrantHive of the Eye Tyrant

While Lair of the HydraLair of the Hydra and Hall of Storm GiantsHall of Storm Giants can conceivably kill a man, Den of the BugbearDen of the Bugbear is rescued by its creature type synergies.

Also, it bothers me that Hall of Storm GiantsHall of Storm Giants isn't named Hall of the Storm Giants. Now you have to live with it, too.

Kamigawa: Neon Dynasty — Channel Lands

1. Boseiju, Who EnduresBoseiju, Who Endures
2. Otawara, Soaring CityOtawara, Soaring City
3. Takenuma, Abandoned MireTakenuma, Abandoned Mire
4. Eiganjo, Seat of the EmpireEiganjo, Seat of the Empire
5. Sokenzan, Crucible of DefianceSokenzan, Crucible of Defiance

Kamigawa: Neon Dynasty is an iconic Commander set, and no cards are more iconic than its cycle of rare lands.

Boseiju, Who EnduresBoseiju, Who Endures is a practically flawless DisenchantDisenchant. Otawara, Soaring CityOtawara, Soaring City bounces every important permanent type. Takenuma, Abandoned MireTakenuma, Abandoned Mire is another instance of the all-important late game value land. Eiganjo, Seat of the EmpireEiganjo, Seat of the Empire can turn the tide of combat in your favor.

And Sokenzan, Crucible of DefianceSokenzan, Crucible of Defiance sucks really, really bad.

Just one, Wizards. Just give me one example of a powerful red land in a chase land cycle. Don't know what to do? Here, let me fix it for you: SokenzanSokenzan now makes a hasty token copy of a target creature you control, except it's not legendary and you sacrifice it at the end of the turn. Activating it costs discounted by the number of legendary creatures you control, and you can only do it as a sorcery.

That would be a worthy include among these titans of Commander, but we're left with a card that barely scratches 125,000 includes in a cycle whose winner pushes half a million.

The Lord of the Rings: Tales of Middle-earth — Legendary Lands

1. Minas TirithMinas Tirith
2. RivendellRivendell
3. Mines of MoriaMines of Moria
4. The ShireThe Shire
5. Barad-dûrBarad-dûr

This is the cycle that convinces me Magic players need more janketeers like me, because Barad-dûrBarad-dûr deserves RivendellRivendell's spot at the very least. You don't actually have to amass Orcs! Just defraud Mordor! Pay nothing into ! You can get another aristocrats trigger in your aristocrats deck for ! 

They're gonna have to drag me off to a padded room as I kick and scream that Barad-dûrBarad-dûr is a misunderstood Teysa KarlovTeysa Karlov.

At least it's much easier to swallow the Castle VantressCastle Vantress argument for RivendellRivendell. And hey, this is another rare white win for best land; drawing cards is always a welcome sight, especially at such a cheap price.

Modern Horizons 3 — Noncreature MDFCs

1. Sink into StuporSink into Stupor
2. Fell the ProfaneFell the Profane
3. Bridgeworks BattleBridgeworks Battle
4. Sundering EruptionSundering Eruption
5. Razorgrass AmbushRazorgrass Ambush

Weird how Fell the ProfaneFell the Profane has 200,000 inclusions when Hagra MaulingHagra Mauling only has 58,000. Apparently, letting the land enter untapped is so powerful that it justifies a 140,000-include gulf.

Since these lands do enter untapped, there's little more to say. These spells are all flawless.

I do find Sundering EruptionSundering Eruption to be underrated here, though. Practically speaking, it jumpsjumps your whole team and blows up a pesky land, and have you seen some of the garbagesome of the garbage that's out there? Crucially, the replacement land enters tapped, and I have used this interaction to get rid of CounterspellCounterspell mana before playing something I definitely want to resolve.

Modern Horizons 3 — Creature MDFCs

1. Witch EnchanterWitch Enchanter
2. Disciple of FreyaliseDisciple of Freyalise
3. Pinnacle MonkPinnacle Monk
4. Hydroelectric SpecimenHydroelectric Specimen
5. Boggart TrawlerBoggart Trawler

The designers really were like "what if we took Reclamation SageReclamation Sage, one of the most popular creatures ever printed, and gave it a ridiculous upside for one more mana?"

Pinnacle MonkPinnacle Monk never stood a chance against Witch EnchanterWitch Enchanter, but what surprises me here is how popular Disciple of FreyaliseDisciple of Freyalise is. I suppose if your commander has a zillion power and doesn't cost anything because it's GhaltaGhalta, then sure, but six is a lot to pay for Life's LegacyLife's Legacy.

Modern Horizons 3 — Actual Lands

1. Shifting WoodlandShifting Woodland
2. Arena of GloryArena of Glory
3. Archway of InnovationArchway of Innovation
4. Spymaster's VaultSpymaster's Vault
5. Monumental HengeMonumental Henge

Shifting WoodlandShifting Woodland is hilarious. Not only is it the best manland in the game (Archon of CrueltyArchon of Cruelty for five, anyone?), it's also capable of turning into any permanent in the game. I have personally, in a mono-green deck, used it to steal a copy of an enemy commander with Helm of the HostHelm of the Host. As to how I did that, that's an exercise to the reader.

Arena of GloryArena of Glory gets much better when you realize you can split the mana it makes across multiple separate creature spells, so you can get two creatures with haste.

I'm not sure it deserves second over Archway of InnovationArchway of Innovation, which gives a spell each turn improvise, but I suppose more red decks deal in haste than blue decks deal in artifacts.

Spymaster's VaultSpymaster's Vault is particularly good if you're in an Orzhov control shell. Malakir RebirthMalakir Rebirth into a board wipe, and then use your last remaining to sculpt your hand and buff the creature you saved.

Finally, there's Monumental HengeMonumental Henge, which I never liked and was apparently correct for that.

Bloomburrow — Typal Lands

1. Mudflat VillageMudflat Village
2. Oakhollow VillageOakhollow Village
3. Lilypad VillageLilypad Village
4. Lupinflower VillageLupinflower Village
5. Rockface VillageRockface Village

Like the hideaway lands are tiered based on how likely their free card was to cast, the popularity of the Bloomburrow villages correspond directly to the popularity of the relevant creature types they buff.

Black gets Rats and Squirrels; green only gets Squirrels; blue gets Rats and Birds; white only gets Birds; and red gets nothing. Better luck next time, red.

Tarkir: Dragonstorm — Wedge Lands

1. Mistrise VillageMistrise Village
2. Dalkovan EncampmentDalkovan Encampment
3. Kishla VillageKishla Village
4. Cori Mountain MonasteryCori Mountain Monastery
5. Great Arashin CityGreat Arashin City

For whatever reason, impulse draw on lands just hasn't been well received. I think the issue stems from the cost; I don't know why I'd bother paying an effective five mana to exile a card for a turn when War RoomWar Room lets me actually draw it for an effective four.

The problem is that making that playable by reducing it to, say, or risks breaking other formats, so I'd solve that problem by printing it in a Commander precon. Or, better yet, just let red play that card for as long as it remains exiled, and have the downside be the fact the card is exiled face-up, visible to all your opponents.

The other interesting thing here is that Mistrise VillageMistrise Village is far more popular than the rest of this cycle. I guess people really hate seeing their spells get countered, but using to pre-game your CounterspellCounterspell seems like it could easily leave you behind if you're bad at judging whether or not your opponents have it.

Final Fantasy — Adventure Lands

1. Midgar, City of MakoMidgar, City of Mako
2. Lindblum, Industrial RegencyLindblum, Industrial Regency
3. Ishgard, the Holy SeeIshgard, the Holy See
4. Jidoor, Aristocratic CapitalJidoor, Aristocratic Capital
5. Zanarkand, Ancient MetropolisZanarkand, Ancient Metropolis

Modern Horizons 3 MDFCs, these are not. All of these spells are two mana too expensive.

Midgar, City of MakoMidgar, City of Mako gets away with it because drawing two for three is on-rate anyway, and Lindblum, Industrial RegencyLindblum, Industrial Regency gets away with it because it's only one mana more than a Firebrand ArcherFirebrand Archer and the loss in power isn't really that important.

I suppose you do get to play the land after you cast the Adventure, but if you're really dropping six mana on Lasting FaythLasting Fayth, something tells me you probably don't need many more land drops.

Edge of Eternities — Station Lands

1. Uthros, Titanic GodcoreUthros, Titanic Godcore
2. Adagia, Windswept BastionAdagia, Windswept Bastion
3. Susur Secundi, Void AltarSusur Secundi, Void Altar
4. Evendo, Waking HavenEvendo, Waking Haven
5. Kavaron, Memorial WorldKavaron, Memorial World

We're finally back full-circle, and my initial impressions were right: Kavaron, Memorial WorldKavaron, Memorial World simply does not compete with the rest of the cycle.

As a quick note, I took these stats on July 15^th and, since this is a new set, the rankings are likely rapidly changing. I don't forsee a future where KavaronKavaron climbs out of its last-place black hole, though.

The Test Results

But does red as a whole compete with the rest of its brethren? Does the question posed by KavaronKavaron end poorly for red, or will number five surprise me? There's a variety of ways to answer that question.

Total Includes

1. — 3,320,932
2. — 2,680,879
3. — 2,422,258
4. — 1,581,481
5. — 1,570,606

In terms of unique mono-colored land includes, red is dead last with just under 1.6 million. Still, it's hot on white's tail, which only has a 10,000-card buffer to work with. Black's lands are the most included, thanks to absurd heavy hitters like Bojuka BogBojuka Bog and Malakir RebirthMalakir Rebirth.

Average Placement

1. — Mean: 2.60, Median: 2
2. — Mean: 2.66, Median: 2
3. — Mean: 3.03, Median: 3
4. — Mean: 3.18, Median: 3
5. — Mean: 3.51, Median: 4

Black and green also have the best average results per-heat, often placing above third. If you were to tier each color based on these results, then black and green are high-tier lands colors, blue and white are mid-tier lands colors, and red is our sole low-tier lands color.

Gold Medals

1. — 12 Wins
2. — 10 Wins
3. — 6 Wins
4. — 3 Wins
5. — 2 Wins

Black is at home on the podium up and down the power-level scale, winning with:

• Lake of the DeadLake of the Dead
• Phyrexian TowerPhyrexian Tower
• Shizo, Death's StorehouseShizo, Death's Storehouse
• Dakmor SalvageDakmor Salvage
• Leechridden SwampLeechridden Swamp
• Bojuka BogBojuka Bog
• Mortuary MireMortuary Mire
• Memorial to FollyMemorial to Folly
• Castle LocthwainCastle Locthwain
• Malakir RebirthMalakir Rebirth
• Mudflat VillageMudflat Village
• Midgar, City of MakoMidgar, City of Mako

Conversely, red only won two of its cycles, getting gold with just Valakut ExplorationValakut Exploration and Ramunap RuinsRamunap Ruins.

Dead Lasts

1. — 10 Last Places
2. — 8 Last Places
3. — 6 Last Places
4. — 5 Last Places
5. — 5 Last Places

The final metric worth looking at is the amount of last place finishes. Red leads in mediocrity, with an astounding ten failures.

Please clap for:

• Keldon MegalithsKeldon Megaliths
• Madblind MountainMadblind Mountain
• Smoldering SpiresSmoldering Spires
• Looming SpiresLooming Spires
• Blighted GorgeBlighted Gorge
• Memorial to WarMemorial to War
• Castle EmberethCastle Embereth
• Sokenzan, Crucible of DefianceSokenzan, Crucible of Defiance
• Rockface VillageRockface Village
• Kavaron, Memorial WorldKavaron, Memorial World

Interestingly, this data also confirms my hypothesis that black's lands are polarizing. It may be the overall winner in mono-color lands, but it also fields some useless fodder, like:

• Spawning PoolSpawning Pool
• Howltooth HollowHowltooth Hollow
• Zof ConsumptionZof Consumption
• Pelakka PredationPelakka Predation
• Hive of the Eye TyrantHive of the Eye Tyrant
• Barad-dûrBarad-dûr
• Boggart TrawlerBoggart Trawler
• Great Arashin CityGreat Arashin City

Looks like Black mages aren't particularly interested in manlands or making tokens.

Final Thoughts

So, red's lands suck. What do we do about it? Well, nothing.

It's okay for colors to have weaknesses. Red's lands are terrible not because red is a bad color, but rather because red is the least able to rely on slower strategies. It wants to rush its opponents down and beat them before it gets to the five or six mana the game expects you to spend on some of these abilities.

Still, if you wanted to include some chase lands for Commander players, I would cheapen their impulse draw abilities, include some ways to make temporary clones of creatures, and print more free activated abilities with an aggressive bent, like adding power to attacking creatures or giving them haste.

And for the love of God, stop making us sacrifice lands to do two damage.