Ellie, Brick MasterEllie, Brick Master | Art by Irvin Rodriguez

Welcome to Too-Specific Top 10, where if there isn’t a category to rank our pet card at the top of, we’ll just make one up! (Did you know that PandemoniumPandemonium is the only ETB effect that allows any player's creature to deal damage to any target?)

In all the excitement of Marvel's Spider-Man, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and Lorwyn Eclipsed all feeling like they were spoiled at the same time, I managed to completely miss the Secret Lair for The Last of Us. Which is a shame, because there's a really cool combination of survivor partners I've seen zero coverage of that does something really unique: Ellie, Brick MasterEllie, Brick Master and Joel, Resolute SurvivorJoel, Resolute Survivor.

What Do Ellie and Joel Do?

Ellie, Brick MasterEllie, Brick Master is an example of a very rare effect we've seen less than a dozen times total in the history of Magic: a commander that creates creatures... for your opponents. While the first example that comes to mind is Varchild, Betrayer of KjeldorVarchild, Betrayer of Kjeldor, most likely, the better comparison is probably Grismold, the DreadsowerGrismold, the Dreadsower.

Even besides those two, however, Ellie also has a CurseCurse thing going on, where she's incentivizing your opponents to attack your other opponents. Put it all together, and it feels like Ellie is a one-of-one kind of effect, despite also being a shout-out to a long list of other cards.

But we're not just talking about Ellie here. She comes as a pair, and of the relevant options available with the "Partner - Survivors" mechanic, the slam dunk of the options is easily Joel, Resolute SurvivorJoel, Resolute Survivor. Ellie makes tokens like its going out of style, and Joel both gets bigger and draws you cards when those tokens die (not to mention any other creature tokens that might occur in a random game of Commander, which is substantial, to put it mildly).

Throw in some goad, and we're cooking with gas here. Still, 1/1 Zombies aren't going to bring home the bacon all by themselves. So what if we could help that along?

Top 10 Universal Pump Effects for Ellie & Joel

Criteria: Permanents that can pump all creatures, all attacking creatures at instant speed, all black creatures, all creatures of a chosen color, all Zombies, or all creatures of a chosen creature type. As is tradition, all results are ordered by EDHREC score.

10. Brass HeraldBrass Herald

(5.13K Inclusions, 0.07% of 7.09M Decks)

You'll be hard pressed to find a more nostalgic old man than me when it comes to Commander as it used to be in the old "slow down and smell the tap lands" days. You'll always find me with a Bracket 1 deck available, even if I seldom find anyone to play it against. So when I say that I've never understood folks that play Brass HeraldBrass Herald, I think I'm putting it pretty plainly how bad I think this card is.

Even here, where it does exactly what we want in making both our and our opponents' Cordyceps bigger, the rate of return is just nowhere near what we need. Six mana is double what Glorious AnthemGlorious Anthem costs, and that card is barely seeing any play these days with all the two-mana options that are available.

Tacking on a situational card draw that's likely to whiff when it only looks at four cards? That just isn't gonna cut it.

9. Warmonger HellkiteWarmonger Hellkite

(6.61K Inclusions, 0.19% of 3.51M Decks)

Luckily, our number nine card is exactly what the doctor ordered. While Warmonger HellkiteWarmonger Hellkite is just as expensive as Brass HeraldBrass Herald and requires you to pump in more mana besides, it makes up for it in several relevant ways.

First, we want blockers cleared out as often as possible. While we'd prefer that to be with goad effects that will guarantee folks won't be attacking us, we're more than happy to let Ellie do her blatant bribery thing and hope that it ends up being enough that our opponents take more damage than us.

And if it doesn't? Then Hellkite's second ability will provide an even greater incentive for our opponents to go at each other, as we offer to pump up their stuff if they go elsewhere.

All in all, this will easily be one of the best cards in our deck, especially if we do manage to goad some things along the way.

8. Konda's BannerKonda's Banner

(7.65K Inclusions, 0.11% of 7.09M Decks)

Konda's BannerKonda's Banner is so close to being another slam dunk for us. Two mana to cast and two to equip means four mana to give all the Zombies +2/+2, a rate that we would windmill slam into the 99.

The only problem? There's a caveat on our flag here that says it must be equipped to a legendary creature. That would be great if either of our commanders were themselves Zombies, but alas, they've yet to feel the inevitable fungal presence required and are simply Human Survivors.

In other words, for this to work, we'd have to be playing a significant amount of Zombies, which we seem unlikely to achieve while playing three-color with multiple existing things we're already trying to build around.

Sorry, Konda, you'll have to find another deck to lead your cause.

7. Ascendant EvincarAscendant Evincar

(Helms 139 Decks, Rank #2,551; 7.89K Inclusions, 0.22% of 3.58M Decks)

Another six-mana card that we wish had a bit more pep behind it, Ascendant EvincarAscendant Evincar is nonetheless close to what we're looking for. Giving all the Zombies on the board +1/+1 is great, and we'd be for making all the other creatures that don't happen to be black smaller, too, if it weren't for one issue: Ellie, the commander that makes our whole strategy tick, is a 2/1 - or a 1/0 if we have Evincar in play.

Still, we're also playing a bunch of pump effects, so I'm not ready to dismiss Evincar out of hand. In short, we'll have to see what other effects we come up with, and in what kind of numbers, to see if this is worth keeping in the 99.

6. Muraganda PetroglyphsMuraganda Petroglyphs

(9.95K Inclusions, 0.30% of 3.28M Decks)

I've always loved the entire idea around this card, so I'm happy to report that this weird Time Spiral nonsense is exactly what this weird brew is looking for. Making all of these Zombies into 3/3s will absolutely have a crushing effect on the table, and is more than worth dedicating four mana to.

The only hope here is that via goad or bribery, we've got enough of these pointed other directions that this doesn't kill us.

5. Bad MoonBad Moon

(14.9K Inclusions, 0.42% of 3.58M Decks)

You know what I'd take way before four mana for +2/+2, though? Two mana for +1/+1. Bad MoonBad Moon provides exactly that, while also making our Joel a bit bigger to boot.

And after half the list being expensive example after expensive example, it's great to see that we'll have at least one card that we'll be able to land early and get the game plan going.

4. Great Oak GuardianGreat Oak Guardian

(17.8K Inclusions, 0.54% of 3.28M Decks)

Alas, we're immediately back to the expensive examples. Great Oak GuardianGreat Oak Guardian does bring some great upside alongside its six-mana cost with flash, however. While holding open all of our mana will always illicit suspicion, I can pretty much guarantee that no one will be seeing a giant Treefolk as the incoming trick.

Even better, while this will give us the option to knock other players out of the game when someone goes for a big attack with all the tokens we've given them, it will also do what it was originally designed to do in playing defense.

In other words, when the discussion around the table starts to inevitably turn against us, we can "foolishly" go for an all-out attack, then wait for the next player in line to swing out at us to untap all our creatures and make them huge blockers.

Throw a Joel into the mix, and we'll be drawing a card for our trouble, too!

3. Death KissDeath Kiss

(28K Inclusions, 0.80% of 3.51M Decks)

Yes, it's yet another six-mana effect. Nonetheless, we love Death KissDeath Kiss, as it not only makes our opponents' stuff bigger (perhaps much bigger if we already have another pump effect out), it also provides a second effect we absolutely need to make this whole thing work: Goad.

It's also quite pricey, with a double-X activation, but if we already paid six mana for the Kiss, then surely we can untap and pump seven into it, right?

2. Lord of the UndeadLord of the Undead

(36.2K Inclusions, 1.01% of 3.58M Decks)

If you'd asked me prior to this article how many old-school Zombie effects there were that didn't have a "you control" rider on them, I would've told you that there were at least a half-dozen. Alas, here in reality, it's somehow only Lord of the UndeadLord of the Undead.

Still, three mana for a Glorious AnthemGlorious Anthem for all those beautiful Zombies out there is just what the doctor ordered, and will do work for us. Welcome to the team, milord.

1. Gauntlet of PowerGauntlet of Power

(52.4K Inclusions, 0.74% of 7.09M Decks)

I'd like to be as enthusiastic about Gauntlet of PowerGauntlet of Power, but there are a lot of hoops to jump through here. In three colors, it's going to be more difficult for us to abuse the Swamp doubling this will facilitate if we choose black to make the Cordyceps bigger.

Alas, not even Urborg, Tomb of YawgmothUrborg, Tomb of Yawgmoth will fix this issue, either, as Gauntlet specifies basic lands. In other words, while this is tempting, I don't think it's workable.

Honorable Mentions

This week, we had a major oversight in our criteria that I'm sure many of you are even now commenting on: We included cards that pumped a chosen creature type, but not cards that just pumped for each example of a given creature type. This led to a rather huge omission in one of the most popular typal cards ever made, Coat of ArmsCoat of Arms.

Lesser known, however, and rightfully left out of our list, is the Coat of Arms variant, Alpha StatusAlpha Status. It only pumps one creature instead of all of them, but given that we have a commander with menace, it will often mean an immediate game over for a player who doesn't have enough blockers.

In other words? Worth the inclusion in the deck list, even if it didn't make the actual list.

Our other arguable omission that I'm sure folks thought of was Agitator AntAgitator Ant, which doesn't pump all creatures, but does pump a given set of creatures each end step. More importantly, however, it also goads said creatures, leading to the game state we're looking for where huge hordes of big creatures are attacking players other than us.

In addition to that sort of targeted effect are a few other "targeted" effects that almost made the list in the variousvarious CrownsCrowns and Echoing CourageEchoing Courage.

The Crowns are great in that they can make one of our Zombies bigger permanently, with the option to sacrifice them at instant speed to make all of the Zombies bigger temporarily. Chief among these is Crown of SuspicionCrown of Suspicion, which pulls double-duty as a pump spell when the Zombies are already large, and a board wipe if they're still in their base 1/1 state.

As for Echoing CourageEchoing Courage, it's exactly what it says on the tin: +2/+2 for every Zombie on the field, at instant speed. Play it on our turn, play it on their turn; just make sure when you play it it's gonna knock someone out of the game.

As for that deck that's gonna be knocking folks out of the game? Let's take a look!

Ellie, Brick Master and Joel, Resolute Survivor Commander Deck List

Despite playing a bunch of Llanowar ElvesLlanowar Elves, this deck isn't going to blow anyone away with its speed. Add to that that we're a pseudo-group hug deck that has a split focus on a few different plans, and this isn't going to destroy any high-powered tables.

With that said, it should be a blast to play against some precons to get some laughs around the table as everyone puzzles their way through huge forced combat steps.

Give it a try and let me know what you think!

Nuts and Bolts

There always seems to be a bit of interest in how these lists are made (this seems like a good time to stress once again that they are based on EDHREC score, NOT my personal opinion…), and people are often surprised that I’m not using any special data or .json from EDHREC, but rather just muddling my way through with some Scryfall knowledge! For your enjoyment/research, here is this week’s Scryfall search.

What Do You Think?

Goad isn't everyone's favorite effect, but I for one do think that it has its place, and still creates fun games. What do you think?

And finally, what is your favorite universal pump effect? Does it work for Ellie's "Zombies"?

Let us know in the comments, and we'll see you at the table with multiple coasters under multiple legs.

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