The Speed DemonThe Speed Demon | Art by Helge C. Balzer

Hello, and welcome to… wait a minute, this isn’t How To Be New. Instead it’s a barren, lifeless landscape. Arid. Gray. And what’s that huge statue sticking up out of the ground, its prestige abandoned, settling into its unceremonious new role as an unwilling docent in this museum honoring nothing?

You approach.

No…

IT WAS MAGIC ALL ALONG! AND YOU ABANDONED IT!

DAMN YOU!! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!!!

*Ahem*

Hello, and welcome to my new series: Roman Begs Anybody Else To Build a Bracket One Deck.

There is so much joy in this game that people are too blinded by the SmokestacksSmokestacks of things like "Combos" and "Value" and "Optimal Play" to see.

I know, because just last week, I discovered it for myself.

For some reason I had found myself considering the updated Bracket system. I think what prompted it was a recent discussion I had about the new Temur () Commander precon, in which some friends and I determined that most precons nowadays fall squarely into Bracket 2. In fact, it's arguable that some, like the Temur precon, probably belong in Bracket 3. And this discussion also came on the heels of a Commander Night at my FLGS in which a friend and I played against some first-time Magic players, and as such used some fresh, or lightly altered, precon decks we kept on hand for such an occasion. We tried to drag our feet, but it seemed like we could hardly set a card on the table without making a strategically useful play that would risk overwhelming these new players.

And that's how I found myself grappling with the question that, since the lowest Bracket deck most players keep on hand is in Bracket 2, what did the Rules Committee possibly imagine for decks in the Bracket 1 range? In my quandary, I read the words under "Bracket 1 - Exhibition" again: "Decks prioritize theme over function and showcase a unique idea or experience over valuing winning."

And suddenly it hit me. A deck where there's something more fun to do than winning. A deck that isn't slavishly tied to things like "life totals" or "paying the one." A deck that's fun to bring to the table. And since it wouldn't focus on competitiveness, maybe there are some other Magic conventions we can bend here. Maybe, in this place away from the watchful eye of the Wizards of the Coast, we could truly, finally, be free.

So I went to the dusty box on the corner of my card shelf which I'd labeled "Every butt-kickin' monster I could find," flipped through some wayward Libromancers, and pulled out five simple cards: a left leg, a right leg, two arms, and a head. The five parts of Exodia, the Forbidden One.

And then I got to building.

The Build

So, Exodia is a Dark attribute monster, which means that we're in mono-black here (the major attributes of Yu-Gi-Oh! line up fairly easily to the mana colors of Magic, I was delighted to find). And if we're in mono-black, maybe there's some sort of sinister reason why we're summoning Exodia. Yes, that'd be the theme of the deck. Cultists trying to summon a dark god in order to destroy the land. It's perfect. Easily understandable, probably works with cards I already have in my collection, a fun hook to help get the other players at my table to buy in. Wonderful.

So first I looked up mono-black card draw commanders (I decided immediately that I would not be using tutors in this deck, as I felt that it could teeter this whole experiment from "quirky sideshow" into "annoying cheat deck"). I found Massacre Girl, Known KillerMassacre Girl, Known Killer and liked the potential theming around that. She gave sort of a Dark Brotherhood vibe (and a quick "Sanguine, my Brother" to any new initiates to the guild since this month's rerelease). I could theme the deck as the spreading of a dark plague around the land that was being used to fuel the evil summoning ritual. But I ran up against a problem: I didn't own Massacre Girl, Known Killer. Plus, I felt like the gimmick might get annoying fast, and I didn't want to get drummed out of the game with only a single leg in hand. So I turned to my box of legends and found a much funnier option: The Speed DemonThe Speed Demon.

As a huge fan of The Fast and the Furious, the theming of Aetherdrift really worked for me, and so I did end up buying a good handful of Aetherdrift packs ("I have a cycling deck," I'd tell myself as I salivated over the glittery vroom machinesglittery vroom machines which darted across every card). Which meant that I had everything I really needed to get The Speed Demon up and running at max speed. And so Death Race was born.

The Speed Demon Bracket 1 Commander Deck List

**Plus the five pieces of Exodia, which my friends at Archidekt informed me could not, at present time, be found on the platform. Unfortunate, but understandable.

It's not much to look at. It's not a very expensive deck. Outside of Bloodthirsty ConquerorBloodthirsty Conqueror (which I happened to have on hand and could easily replace) and Saw in HalfSaw in Half (it should come as no great surprise to any of you that I opened a good amount of Unfinity), every card is less than $3. If you were to make this deck, I'd encourage you to to use a similar low-cost ethos. Hopefully you'll be able to put something satisfactory together using only ingredients that you already have at home.

The whole thing is basically card draw plus ways to get things out of my graveyard and back to my hand, just in case I find any Exodia pieces milled by opponents' effects. The one fun piece worth drawing attention to is Pact WeaponPact Weapon, which I envisioned as my cultists' last ditch effort to keep this ritual on the rails as the cave collapses around them. It would keep me alive unnaturally, but I'd have to start revealing cards from the top of my deck, making my plans clear to the other players as I made my last desperate attempts to enact them. The whole thing felt very Monster of the Week in a way that I absolutely adored.

Deck Introduction and Rule Zero

My friend, to whom I'd already confessed the secret of this deck, saved me a seat in his pod at the next Commander Night at my FLGS. I waited for the other three to finish a quick preliminary game before listing through some decks I was interested in playing. "Oh, I mean, I have this new cycling deck I've been wanting to try," I opened, "and Nelly BorcaNelly Borca, who's always a good time. And I also brought this new, highly-thematic Bracket 1 deck I just put together. It's sorta crazy, but I think it'll be fun."

The other two were immediately curious. How could they not be? Nobody knows what happens down at Bracket 1. Use this to your advantage. Bracket 1 is, for the moment, sort of intriguing and mysterious, so how could they resist?

My Bracket 1 deck was requested, so I took it out, and over opening shuffles, I gave my somewhat rehearsed spiel: "This is a highly-thematic deck that runs some cards which are not currently Commander-legal. It's themed around a dark cult looking to enact a ritual to summon an old god who will destroy the world. I'll be drawing for a five-card combo that, when I get it in my hand, I will win the game. I'll put this red die here as a marker of how close I am so you can feel the countdown to doomsday as it ticks down. Is that all good for everyone?"

Now, I do hear the objection you've just shouted at your phone, and allow me a moment to answer it. Technically, I told the truth. The five pieces of Exodia aren't currently legal in the Commander format. To those of you who'd counter by saying "Well, yeah. They're Yu-Gi-Oh! cards. They could never be Commander legal," I suppose I'm just more of an optimist.

With everything caveated and agreed upon, we began to play.

The Game

I further affirmed the fact that I had a mostly vibes-based deck by opening on turn three with The Toymaker's TrapThe Toymaker's Trap. The table lit up. Nobody had seen this before. And why would they? Who would run this? I run a choices-based The ValeyardThe Valeyard deck that's full of evil decisions for the other players to make, and I couldn't even make space for this card. And that's what makes it a perfect card for this deck. We had so much fun adjudicating this little game every time my turn came around. I even bargained with one of the other players to have him guarantee that he would guess a specific number on my next upkeep in exchange for allowing an attack through on his turn.

It was so much lighter than my typical Commander experience where the table is trying to pal around about how legitimately worried they're becoming about the growing army of gnomes across the battlefield from them. We had so much fun with it, in fact, that an opponent intentionally guessed wrong on the last available number, allowing me to draw a card and letting The Toymaker's Trap sit on the board for the rest of the game as a monument to the fun minigame we had all played.

I wasn't much of a target, as at this point I was doing a good enough job at killing myself through The Speed Demon's four life per turn tax. So I sat back, drawing cards, enjoying watching myself try to assemble the mass of bulk I'd pointed in the general direction of a strategy. And there were more fun moments to be had. A personal favorite was when I finally, finally got to play Butch DeLoria, Tunnel SnakeButch DeLoria, Tunnel Snake (a card which feels like it could fit somewhere, but has so much more value as a meme) and then immediately sacrifice him to draw two cards. There's a part of me that still feels a little awkward when I play my The Jolly Balloon ManThe Jolly Balloon Man deck and have to both calculate and adjudicate multiple copies of Devilish ValetDevilish Valet which are set to swing for three digits. But this game was simply pure bliss.

The Reveal

It had come down to the point where there were only three players left, and despite the goodwill I had received, my days were clearly numbered. In fact, I was set to die the very next turn. And the worst possible news: my countdown was still at two minutes to midnight with about 35 cards left in my deck. On that last turn, I played some of my most coherent Magic to date. I was a machine, wringing every last bit of card draw I could from my hand which was, at this point, well north of 40 cards. I was soon rewarded with one buff, chained, golden arm. And finally, on my end step, there he was, grinning back at me, as ready for this catharsis as I was.

I picked up the red die from the table, gave my opponent one last chance to guess at my mythical, forbidden combo, and then I laid it out on the table.

Left leg, right leg, left arm, right arm.

Exodia. Obliterate.

The wide-eyed, disbelieving laughter at the table. The fist bump I received. I cannot imagine that a Pro Tour victory would feel as good as these accolades did.

OK, Roman. We Get It. So What's Your Point?

Well, first off, I wanted to brag. Obviously. I may well have made history as the first person to ever win a game of Magic by activating Exodia's effect. Eat your heart out, 20 Ways To Win.

But most importantly, the point that I'm trying to make is that I want this kind of experience to be more widespread. I bet less than 10% of Commander players even have a Bracket 1 deck put together. And honestly, 10% feels high. And as much fun as I had playing my Exodia deck, I know I would have a much better time at a table where each person had a funny bit they were trying to pull off in their own ridiculous and unusual way.

So please, just try it out. Put all of your optimization instincts aside and just think about something that would be fun for you to do.

Figure out a way to use The Nipton LotteryThe Nipton Lottery to win with The Cheese Stands AloneThe Cheese Stands Alone (honestly, do absolutely anything with The Nipton Lottery. That spell doesn't see near enough play for how fantastically hilarious it is). Make an army of statues with Doomed ArtisanDoomed Artisan and try to win by untapping them all with Halo FountainHalo Fountain. Heck, add Leonardo da VinciLeonardo da Vinci, Determined IterationDetermined Iteration, and throw in a few Weeping AngelsWeeping Angels, and just do a whole statues-themed deck. Why? Why NOT?

Don't rely on the limited imaginations of the format to determine your win conditions either. Write your own. Iterate upon them (in a determined way or a not determined way, your choice). Hold your own lottery by randomly choosing a creature in your deck and declaring that if it wins The Nipton Lottery, you win the game. Get creative. Have fun with it. Don't just play Magic. Play with Magic.

The other Brackets will always be there for us to optimize and card advantage and combo off. But please, even if for just one game, join me at the Bracket 1 table. I promise that it'll be the most fun you have all night.