Borrowed GraceBorrowed Grace | Art by Volkan Baga
Hello, and welcome to Am I the Bolas? This week, how much grace do I extend?
This column is for all of you out there who have ever played some Magic and wondered if you were the bad guy. I'm here to take in your story with all of its nuances so I can bring some clarity to all those asking, "Am I the Bolas?"
I'm ready to hear you out and offer advice. All you have to do is email [email protected] with your story, a pseudonym you want to use, and of course, only include details you don't mind in the column! You might see your story below one day. You might even hear it on the podcast. Which podcast?
I'm Mike Carrozza and I've gone back to school!
THE FRIGGIN' SCHOOL-A HARD KNOCKS!
(Post edited for brevity, clarity, and then some.)
SUBMISSION
Hi Mike,
I've got one I've gone over numerous times in my head, and although (maybe biased) I don't think I was in the wrong, I wonder if I could have done more to help the situation
This one requires a quick trip down memory lane to a game about a month or two before the one we're about to discuss. The pod begins with a Jin-GitaxiasJin-Gitaxias in the command zone, specifically the one that flips into a Saga, which on its last step is basically OmniscienceOmniscience.
I'd played against this deck numerous times and knew it was very powerful. If left to do its thing, it will consistently win by turn five. Its strategy is to proliferate poison counters using Inexorable TideInexorable Tide and lots of cantrips to take the game.
I tell the pod this and we all pull out our strongest decks. Myself on K'rrik, Son of YawgmothK'rrik, Son of Yawgmoth, another on Chatterfang, Squirrel GeneralChatterfang, Squirrel General, and the fourth player was on an Enchantress commander I don't remember.
Long story short, Jin-Gitaxias is five spells from winning, with a handful of cards, access to nearly ten mana on his next turn, and Jin was Imprisoned in the MoonImprisoned in the Moon. No one else is close, so we knew if we didn't deal with the Inexorable TideInexorable Tide we'd almost certainly lose on Jin's next turn. So, the Enchantress player exiles the Inexorable TideInexorable Tide and the Jin player immediately scoops, expressing their dissatisfaction in being targeted, and letting us know they're not coming back to the store.
A couple of months later, this player returns to the store. We talk, he apologized, I said we're cool, and we get a game going. He's not played properly since, he didn't have a new deck, but he said it's been powered down. Wanting to have a good game, I went in giving him the benefit of the doubt. I didn't mention to the other players in the pod how that deck plays.
This time, I'm playing Alexios, Deimos of KosmosAlexios, Deimos of Kosmos as the commander for a Goblin deck. Without a Goblin commander, it's on par with precons and is fun for new players to play against. The other two decks proved inconsequential due to unlucky draws. As the players at the table hadn't played against Alexios, I let them know the usual way to slow/help combatis to spread the damage as much as possible when you either can't remove it or it isn't beneficial for you to remove it yet.
As we're shuffling up, I see Jin stacking his deck, or at least it looks like it, as he's sifting through cards and moving some to the top. Not wanting to draw attention to it and cause trouble, I don't say anything, but intend to suggest cutting when they put their deck down.
I'm not quick enough and they draw a hand. I never care about cutting for friendly games usually, and I expect fairness. Feeling he may know why I'm suggesting it, I let it go. This feels inconsequential from how the game played out, but is something I'm aware of.
We reach a point in the game where myself and Jin have pulled ahead because of the other two were either mana flooded or screwed. At the mana flooded player's turn, Alexios hasn't been removed and is now a lethal threat to Jin and the mana-screwed player.
I feel bad because Alexios usually just acts as a distraction while I get enough Goblins out to hopefully find a fun way to take players out with Goblins. The folks at the store usually aren't shy on targeted removal, which is why I don't expect Alexios to win by himself. Unfortunately, no one had found an answer.
Jin is chosen to be attacked, which kills them, and the conversation begins again about being targeted. It ends with with them getting upset and they've not been back since. We tried to explain that we weren't targeting them and we do like them and their decks, but sadly it wasn't enough.
I'd be interested in what you think, and thanks for the great column. I check in every week for new posts!
Cheers!
Jaybird
VERDICT
Thank you for writing and asking me to weigh in on your story. As I mention every week, if folks don't write to me, there's no column, so if you, the reader, want to send me a story, whether it's your own or one from Reddit or a friend's, please send it to [email protected] and I'll get to it here.
Not the Bolas. Let me get that out of the way for ya, Jaybird.
I think you had a chat with a fellow player, accepted an apology, and gave it another crack. Unfortunately, Jin isn't ready to accept that in a game of free-for-all, you'll be on the receiving end of damage and removal.
Everybody's goal is to manage their opponents' impact on their game plan and pushing through for a win. Game actions lead to this, and sometimes, you're the one getting attacked. In fact, I'd say, Jin should be prepared for this most when sitting down for Magic.
We all should.
This article isn't going to be a very fun one. This submission's really upset me, actually.
The Jin player's hiatus from the game came from his opponents recognizing they needed to disrupt his game plan in order to accomplish their own goal. They observed with ease that the Inexorable TideInexorable Tide threatened to defeat them and they came together to neutralize a joint threat.
Listen up: I am so sick of these kinds of stories. People who become the archenemy at the table and cannot handle the target that it paints on them when ostensibly their deck is doing what it's supposed to - it's time to accept it, or start pulling punches in either your deckbuilding or game play.
Make the decision. You can even lean in, if you'd like. It could be fun to power up your deck and for it to become a new challenge for a playgroup, or maybe you'll end up at a higher-Bracket pod and you'll find your speed.
Either way, I think it is absolutely unfair and frankly inconsiderate to play the fool or the pouty baby when you are five spells from nuking a table gone and the card enabling this gets removed. You have soured the vibe immensely.
When the table comes together, even if it's against you, you're part of that experience. It's exciting that someone has risen to the challenge presented. Does this mean that you're done? Not necessarily! You've got more options, you were in the most commanding position. And guess what! Now, you get to find a way to rise to the occasion and come back. Isn't that exciting? Dynamics in your fantasy strategy card game? Jeez Louise!
When I play Commander and I have a board of threatening pieces, I will try to save them with my cards or cutting a deal. I won't say it's unfair or unwarranted, but most of all, I'm not scooping because someone got rid of my Terror of the PeaksTerror of the Peaks in my CloneClone deck. It's my time to pivot, now. I've built a whole damn deck.
Jin seems incapable of seeing it from his opponents' perspective. If I have a creature that must attack and can take out a player, I'm probably going to take out the player that's going to be more difficult to deal with as the game goes on.
I think this is good threat assessment given the context. Why is the player sending Alexios to Jin so wrong to attack him? And why does this offend Jin so much that he has to leave again?
It's a poor attitude, and while they might be a decent person outside of Commander, this is someone whose second strike counts for two for me. Have some class and act like you've been there before.
I also want to say that your situation where you don't call Jin out on stacking his deck is a difficult one to navigate, and I think your plan to offer a cut was good. The problem is, at any other point, this confrontation comes down to what's at risk. You didn't want to jeopardize your relationship with this person, which is fair, but we must acknowledge that cheating in a game, regardless of stakes, is disrespectful to the other players.
I would encourage you to speak up should something like this come up again. As long as you're certain about the cheating, I think a quick "what're you doin'?" gets the message across without having to levy a direct accusation. But be ready for it if it comes to that.
An apology isn't worth much if the first thing a person does is disrespect you immediately after.
In conclusion, embrace being the archenemy, call out cheaters when you catch them, and live from New York it's SATURDAY NIGHT!
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Mike Carrozza
Mike Carrozza is a stand-up comedian from Montreal who’s done a lot of cool things like put out an album called Cherubic and worked with Tig Notaro, Kyle Kinane, and more people to brag about. He’s also been an avid EDH player who loves making silly stuff happen. @mikecarrozza on platforms.
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